we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
