we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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