operation have a gay friend backfired
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Randomize
