There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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