It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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