ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
