he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Randomize
