thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
