where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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