Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize