what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
