Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Even my vagina gasped.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
