She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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