A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
