Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
