Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
