on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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