Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
