sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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