OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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