Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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