Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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