this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Randomize