Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize