sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
