im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
