She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
We are all done wearing pants today
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
My feet surprised me
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
