I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Randomize
