so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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