Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
