just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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