Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
