in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Apparently you make a good broom.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
You dont lie about slip and slides
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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