Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Randomize
