I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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