A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize