we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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