Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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