i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
it's like iHOP with fire
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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