I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
