What a fucking waste of an outfit
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
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