oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
