So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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