Is it normal to miss your booty call?
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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