in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
