all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
