i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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