One girl and one boy is just not enough.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
There's always time for handjobs
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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