I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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