The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize