Its about making memories worth repressing
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I just found a bag of teeth...
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
