Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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